Disperato
by A Bleach-Drinking Hetalian
Summary: The year is 1943; Italy doesn't want to leave Germany. He's never wanted anything than to be by her side, to see the German happy. But are his own feelings, or that of his people, more important? Historical accuracy? Italy/Fem!Germany.


**Well, this has been taking up space on my flashdrive for about a month, so I finally finished it.  
I'm tired of seeing GerIta and USUK with 'Rape' and 'Sadness', since that's all I can effing find nowadays! That's why my otp'sve changed to FRUK, AmeCan, CanUk, Germano..  
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**But.. I'm open to all pairings, in the end. :D -bricked-**

**Che. I'll stop rambling.. ****The title was translated by one place into 'forlorn', but another said it means 'derived of hope'.. Italian is confusing, I guess. |3  
(Edit: nemiah told me it means despair. Danke~)  
**

**I don't own Hetalia; enjoy my craptastic fanfiction anyway!**

**(Ps, Lud here's at least three inches shorter then feli, but still kinda buff... for a girl.. am I making sense?)  
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* * *

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Italy stood outside of Germany's office. The blonde woman scolded him often, and he feared that to be his fate yet again. The Italian wished to run, but he didn't want her madder at him! No, he'd take it like a non-Italian!

He pushed the door open, bracing himself.

The German was pacing, back and forth, from the bookcase to her desk. She didn't seem to notice the Italian, instead pausing to read some paperwork.

"Lud!" He approached his friend. "You called! Ve! Are you in a pinch? Could I help?"

Ludivine turned, red-rimmed eyes apparent that something was definitely wrong. Her normally short-cropped hair was hanging in greasy threads around her face, and her eyes.. they held a hopelessness that frightened the Italian.

At the immediate sight of him, she managed a small smile. But the German's lip trembled, expression melting into a frown as her eyes got watery. "No. I finally made a decision.. and I must go through with it."

The Italian smiled. It was very like his Lud to be obsessive sometimes! Maybe that was it! "Ooh, what is it! Ve! I wanna help!"

"It actually concerns you, Italy." Germany glanced at him briefly, before returning her blue orbs to the ground.

Even better! Then he could help her, and she could be happy!

"I need you to leave the Axis."

He gave her a blank stare, brown eyes opening fully. "Oh, you must be kidding with me! I never really got your jokes, did I? Ve!" He didn't continue, Germany's glare stopped him.

"I'm not kidding at all." She said, pushing her bangs back to reveal the worry coating her features. "It's not good for you to fight alongside me."

But the Italian wanted to fight with her, to be anywhere near her! "Being with you makes me happy, Lud!" He argued, trying to stay positive. "It's your boss, right? Well, just talk to him, ve! We're advisers to our leaders, and vice versa!"

"You believe I wouldn't try the rational thing first? Our boss is an evil man, and my schwester and I have tried countless times to talk him out of his nefarious actions!" Her voice was rising with anger, hysterics gracing her tone. "In fact, she's trying for a ninth time! NINTH! Even Otto listened to us better then this asshole! But this bastard.. he's poisoned us.."

"My poor people.. I can feel their pain.." She grasped her chest. "Deep within me.. their screams.. the everlasting burn.." Germany's eyes watered again. "It's tearing into my very soul.."

Italy watched his friend talk about the bad things her boss did, tears streaming down her face. He scooched over slowly to the German, finally managing to get his arms around her.

"But Lud, you didn't want those things, ve? Please don't blame yourself if it's a bad boss.. I mean, I don't like my boss, but you just.." He gave her a light squeeze. "Please be ok.."

The German tried composing herself. "Italy.."

"Lud, I-"

She gave Italy a push, making him back off. "Feliciano Vargas."

He shut it.

"I do not wish for you to go through what I have.. Please understand that.. I have enjoyed having you as an ally. Truly. Even if you were helpless at times.." She smiled at him briefly, serious face returning as she continued. "But only if we were under better circumstances.. I wouldn't have made this as personal as it's become."

"I promised to protect you.." She whispered. Germany held his face in her hands, watching the Italian she held so dear, though he may not know it, burst into small sobs. The blonde knew he felt the same heartache she did, and it pained her every time she saw him shed a tear.

"And I plan to keep that promise."

* * *

_September 8th, 1943: Italian surrender to allies is announced._

* * *

America looked at Italy, who'd traveled to England's house, distrustfully. "So, whatcha think you're doing here, Italy?" He crossed his arms, smirking. "Wanna surrender at the source?"

Italy frowned. England was a girl, so he thought he'd be able to talk easier to her about this.. switching sides.

But as it turns out.. all of the Allies were at her house. Russia was staring at Italy possessively, making him quake on the inside.

"Ve.. England? I'd like to speak to her.." He looked away, trying not to let the American intimidate him.

He harrumphed. "Hey Iggy, wimpy here wants to see ya!"

England strode out of her house, glaring at the American with large, furrowed brows. "You little git, I swear if you were any louder, the entire bloody United Kingdom would hear you!" She hissed, making America laugh.

She turned her sights to the Italian. "What is it?"

He twiddled his thumbs, trying to stall. "Ve.. I.." Italy didn't want to ask them, or even associate with them. They fed him gross food, and hit him, and...

Germany said to.

That's why he was doing it.

He looked up, determined. "I want to join the Allies!"

America's booming laughter rang out from inside the house, but the other four mirrored shocked faces.

England gestured for Italy to follow her in. In the hallway, her narrowed green eyes bored into him. "What about your ally, Germany? Japan, even? Are they not.. ah.. friends of yours?"

Germany said he had to join these guys.. for his own good!

He tried his best Romano expression, scoffing. "Ve, you think I'd care about them? _Numero uno _is the only one that matters!" Italy pointed at himself with his thumb, sneering.

Italy noted that he had to remember to thank his fratello~! Years of living with Lovi made his impersonation perfect! Ve~

"A wise choice, in my opinion.." A predatory smile flashed briefly, drowning out her ladylike composure. "And why turn to us? Too weak to fight Mrs. Nazi off yourself?"

"We're in the middle of war; what matters is victory." He shrugged, trying not to cry at his own words. "Germany was strong, so I became Germany's friend. Germany is weak, so I'm becoming the Allies friend. Che."

But.. how can Romano act so mean? Italy was hurting inside at his own words..

Russia giggled, prancing into the room. "I like him! I vote we let him in, da?"

America smiled in the brunette's direction. "Me too! Someone that heartless HAS to be able to kick _some_ ass, at least."

_-Italy didn't want to re-think what France said, and so it won't be mentioned here; however, know that he was accepted in a long, frivolously perverted way-_

China sighed, returning to her tea. "Fine, aru."

England patted his shoulder, jumbling up the Italian's emotions even more. He wanted to stay with his Lud, but she told him to go here; his Italian self-preservation skills agreed.

He gulped, smiling in a carefree Italian way.

Blabbing randomly in a carefree Italian way.

Crying on the inside in a cowardly Italian way..

* * *

_October 13th, 1943: Italy declares war on Germany_

* * *

He'd known this day would come. Italy didn't know when, nothing like that.

But.. the time came all too soon for him.

He peeked over a trench, helmet hiding his individual features. Italy watched his blonde command her men into doing what they did not wish to do: to hurt the Italian's they'd once worked with.

The brunette peered back at his troops, a good chunk of whom were clutching their rosaries closely. He pulled out his own, praying for their survival. Neither side wished to fight the other; Italy knew many of his Italians managed to befriend their German ex-allies...

But he put on his brave face, waving his white flag until he had all eyes on him. "We only need to distract them, men! Ve! Soon, soon we won't have to worry about this any longer.. but.." Italy wiped the tears out of his eyes, trying to sound as brave as he could. "We have to try our very best! That's all we can do, ve!"

He meeped, ducking, when a bullet whizzed over his head. The men scattered to their designated locations.

* * *

_April 30th, 1945: Hitler commits suicide._

_And days pass, ever so slowly onward.._

* * *

It'd been days since it started. There were casualties on either side.

Italy had a sudden burst of courage.

He jumped out of the trench, much to the dismay of his men, and ran at the opposite side. The barbed wire cut him, but it was healing already. He didn't need to worry, nor would he have. The brunette dodged the artillery that almost hit him more than once in the no-man's-land, coming to a full stop in the middle.

He held his white flag up, making one think he would wave it, before snapping it in half with one hand and throwing it aside.

It was a declaration of personal battle. One-on-one, nation to nation.

The blonde jumped over her trench, running at a breakneck speed to the middle. Her own helmet hid her face, saber bared at the ready. The gun Italy thought she would've used was slung on her belt, sloppily, for one so neat.

He held his gun up, sweeping around the bayonet, while bracing it with two hands. He barely blocked her first strike.

He gritted his teeth, parrying a few neutral blows before striking her arm. The Italian was momentarily dazed before he remembered who he was dealing with.

"I thought.. I could be strong for you, Lud.. but.." He teared up, watching the red liquid seep onto her uniform. "I can't do it." He threw his weapon carelessly to his left, throwing his helmet off to it's companion.

"Italy." The German said, almost commandingly. "Pick up your weapon. We fight."

"Ve.. Hurting you.. hurts me too much.." The Italian ever so gently caressed her cheek, pulling her own helmet off. It seemed like the German had been counting on it to hide her emotions, since watery azure eyes met his own. "I don't like hurting you.."

"Do it." Her gaze hardened, as did the grip on her saber.

"I listened to you when you told me to go.." He avoided the sharp metal, instead wrapping his arms gently around the German. "And now that I'm free, I'm not listening; you need to get free as well... Ve.."

He tried to be positive, even when the German slammed her sword into the soft dirt, then sobbed onto the Italian. Clutching him tightly, explaining the unseen terrors of this war.. the war she'd never wanted. The war she hated with all of her being, and then some.

They hadn't noticed that the world was silent at that moment, save for them.

"SCHW- GERMANY! SOMETHING AWESOME HAPPENED!" Prussia shouted, running up to the jilted duo with a broad smile plastered on her face. Germany pushed Italy away, mildly pink at her embarrassment. The Prussian held up a short telegraph, shoving it in her sister's face. "He'd dead!"

Italy cocked his head. "Who?"

Germany's smile matched Prussia's exactly. "Him.. Hitler.." She embraced the Italian tightly. "He's dead.. He's.. That bastard is finally gone!"

Italy smiled, planting small kisses over her blonde hair.

* * *

_May 2nd, 1945: German Troops in Italy Surrender._

* * *

Italy invited the sisters stay at his house until the allies visited, a mere five day later. Germany announced in front of them, with all of the dignity she could muster.

"I.." She choked on her words, looking down. "I surrender.."

Italy hugged the German, passing what little strength he could onto her.

* * *

_May 7th,1945: Unconditional surrender of __all__ German forces to Allies. _

* * *

Prussia held her head up high, even as the Russian placed his hand on the small of her back to lead her away, brushing against her silver locks.. "Do not worry, comrades.. She is in good hands, da?"

The German shuddered, and Italy sensed she was resisting the urge to demand her older sibling back.

* * *

_June 5th, 1945: Allies divide up Berlin and Germany, taking over the government._

* * *

_July 1st, 1945: America, England, and France send their troops into Berlin, effectively taking over West Germany, while Russia has reign over the East.  
_

* * *

Italy dithered around in England, trying his best to find the lady's house. He'd been away so long, the mild rebuilding that was beginning made it impossible for the brunette to recognize anything. His curl drooped as he thought about how strange he must be among these people..

But when he found her house, finally, the blonde ushered him in. "She's been waiting for you, you must know this.." The Brit scolded, leading Italy to the kitchen.

"Feliciano?" Clad in an apron over a simple black maids dress, Germany was in the process of preparing curry for England.

The Italian tackled German, nuzzling her affectionately. He let out a happy "Ve~", extremely glad things worked out for the best.

For the most part, anyway.

* * *

**Welpers.  
There you have it. One of the most common of historical Romances [*cough* next to FrUK *cough*], GerIta! I only wish I could've made a Chibitalia x HRE reference, but lo and behold, the story wouldn't allow any in there~  
**

**Metabolic and Tsunderella fueled this ff, musicwise. :3**

**Common sense will tell you that Numero Uno means number one~  
(Unless you just know random stuff and have no common sense, like mua~)**

**www. historyplace. com/ worldwar2/ timeline /ww2time .htm  
This might also help.. go down to about 1943 or so, around the end, and you'll see Italy surrendered to allies before joining them. But that's all dates..**

**Here's the history in a nutshell:  
In 1943 the Allies invaded & seized Sicily, and then invaded the Italian mainland at Salerno, south of Naples. That caused the majority of the Italian people to turn against Mussolini. The Italian government would split into the two factions: Pro-German Fascists, and the Pro-Allies Republican. The Republican faction of government was formally endorsed by Italy's King, ended his war with the allies; he would later declare war on Germany, thus switching sides while German forces resisted the Allied invasion in Italy. The part of Italy occupied by Germany would be in-name only aligned with Germany under Fascist leadership. Most Italians were now sympathetic to the Allied cause and considered Allied forces to be liberators. Italy would end the war on the side of the allies. However, his earlier siding with Germany would put him in an unusual political position at the end of the war.**

**Ah.. how I love History.. I think more stories on it would be interesting, ne?  
Yeah.. with France.. :3  
-should totes be working on multi ch fics instead-  
**

**Also, whether it's Indian or Japanese, curry is truly a treat~! I suggest you try both~! (But England would prefer Indian curry, right? They did invade India, after all..) |3**

**I didn't know how to fit Lovi into this story.. sorry! Dx  
I'll write more Germano soon~! ;D**

**Stay awesome!  
(****=ヮ =)9**


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